Today I thought I would touch base on something that has become a bit of a problem for me the last couple of days. The last couple of days I have been thinking about a lot of the negative feedback I have received from people around me, close and distance relationships. We all receive negativity, so I wanted to tell you all my experiences recently and see if you can relate and we can talk about it together.
I have never been good at maintaining a concrete work path, I haven’t found my forte (besides blogging) – I pick things up and drop them when I decide that it isn’t what I want to do. I have always struggled with hobbies as well, I haven’t found anything that can keep me interested long enough. This shows in my work history, I have had numerous jobs that are polar opposites of the spectrum and my timeline is horrendous. I just can’t stick at things if they aren’t what I am happy doing – I find it hard to waste time. When I don’t want to do something, my stubbornness refuses to budge and I literally can’t go. My mind will just switch off.
This has always had poor feedback from people close around me. It comes from a good place, but they will question if I will stick at a new job if I get one, or will tell me to do things differently, or to not even try for things because they think that I won’t stick at it. It makes it hard for me to find motivation to try new things or branch out because of the negative feedback I receive. I have never been unemployed for longer than a week or two, I find new jobs quick and I have never needed financial support – I have always looked after my own and been able to support myself. This is why I am okay in the adjustments I make in my life because I know I can financially support myself. I go into new jobs with high hopes and motivation, and it’s saddening to see people crush that and place their negative feedback on top of my positivity. I don’t get into a new role with every intention of abandoning it, I get into it excited that it is going to be the right job for me. So to get feedback questioning my motives and throwing shade to my “new beginning” feelings – it hurts.
Being my age, 20 years old – I’m still trying to find my place in the world. Most people around me know what they want to be from a young age and will go into study to be qualified in what they want to be. I had no idea, and now my goal is to make something out of blogging – but until I make that happen, I need something to pay the bills obviously. Which sounds simple, but it really isn’t. Sometimes you need to be a certain kind of person for a particular role, and for a long time it has felt like nothing fits. It makes it hard. When you are trying your best, it feels like people frown upon you for being on the search for the right thing rather than wasting away in a dead end job that kills you every day you go.
I don’t understand the negative backlash from it though, because why would you waste your time in a position that someone else would thrive in while you find a place that you can thrive in? We have such a societal view that it should be frowned upon if you haven’t spent 5+ years in a job that you fucking cannot stand. It’s pointless, it is absolutely pointless. If you are still aspiring to be involved in the work force, but just choosing the right job for you and being employed the entire time as you go find it – why is that a problem? The problem should be focused on the people that aren’t even looking for jobs and plan to be on the tax payers money for their entire lives. The frowns should be cast upon the people that don’t even show up to work every day.
People can’t even have the space to find the right job, it’s assumed you find a job and it will just magically fit and everything will be fine and dandy. Money is money, you can get it in any role, anything that pays the bills is fine. Sure. But why not find a job that you hate that little bit less?
I have been raised to have incredible tolerance and patience, but lately it is running thin because I am letting the negative feedback get to me. I am incredibly sensitive when it comes to people having opinions on what I am doing with my life, because I feel like I am continually chasing the end of the rainbow but the closer I get the further it fades away from me.
The most important thing is to just do you. Sometimes, as stupid as it is, only you know what is good for you – you truly know how you feel about situations and you have to focus on yourself. Majority of the time people only want the best for you and worry about your well being, it comes from a good place. Other times people want to see you fail, and you can’t let that happen. Look after yourself.
I will always stand by the fact that if something isn’t fulfilling you or you aren’t giving your 150% to something – don’t waste your time. Life is too short and you need to break the norm of being stuck in something that isn’t good for you. You can’t please everyone, and you will always do something that at least 9/10 people wouldn’t even imagine of doing. If you are in a position where you know you will be able to look after yourself or you know things will be fine – then make that change.
Everything can be changed.