Thought this would be something interesting as I currently am living the aftermath of this kind of scenario. Hopefully I’ll be able to answer a lot of questions around this topic just through experience.
Now, workplace relationships. I’m not talking about having your go-to work pal that you talk to on your lunch break. I’m talking about finding a serious long term romantic partner within the workplace.
So, either you are questioning it or are currently living it. My advice if you are questioning going for it and giving it a shot, you need to be 150% sure of your choice. Once you get romantically involved in the workplace, you are stuck there.
Let me get one thing straight:
If it ends terribly, one of you are going to have to leave.
If it goes well, one of you are still going to have to leave.
Either it ends and it hurts too much to see them everyday or it just becomes incredibly awkward. Maybe you find someone new, and they have to understand the fact you see your ex everyday at work. That would be weird. Another scenario, it’s going well and you want to branch out and perhaps go find a new career path. Or you aren’t enjoying your role, and you are saddened that you won’t be with them everyday on the way to work. Maybe it becomes harder to have that wiggle room on your options.
There are some couples that have created a business together and somehow make it work, but guaranteed their steaminess and spark is pretty much non existent. Can you imagine working with your partner every single day all day and still wanting to go home to get cute and romantic together? To be honest, I love my partner so much that I would probably say yes to that, luckily he and I are actually just one of a kind.
If you are the the type of person who needs to be in a different room than them once in a while, or just want to get involved into your own little bubble – do not work with them! Work needs to be your jam. Money is money, but maybe you get a powerful motivational kick when you see your wage come into the bank. That is your earnings at your own job. You know? Maybe you need that to be special for you to see that coming from your employer. Maybe you have your own morning wake up time with your headphones in on the way to work, maybe that really gets you going in the day. There are multiple things to consider.
You have to get up every day in the morning and go to the same place, if you are leaving with them, staying at the workplace with them, then coming home with them, to spent your time at home with them – can you see the problem here? That was confusing to write, but what I’m saying is you literally will be with them 24/7. They will know every time you go to the bathroom and take extra long, when you scratch your face, when you look around the room – they will literally be there all the time. Constant clock. Not to mention if you both are in an argument, you should be able to go to work and leave it all for later to deal with – not to continue!
Here’s a little story about my experience. My partner and I met at work on my first day, we both were in IT. The very first moment I saw him, my jaw literally hit the earths core. A spark in me just ignited. This is a cliche, but love at first sight it actually a thing. It literally happened to me.
We tried to not pursue our feelings for a good week or two, constantly talking about how we shouldn’t get involved and focus on work. Because you know, that’s what adults do. Do they? Really? And guess what happened? We went out mid week to a Japanese bar after work and had a few drinks together. We shared our first kiss there too, which was absolutely magical. When you are kissing your soul mate, you know.
I remember he would walk me to my train every single day, literally sit with me on the train until a minute before it took off and he would get himself home no matter what time. He would stay up with me for hours on the phone, we would talk about anything and everything. Then life just took its course. It just became too hard to leave him at the end of the day. We moved in together, still managed to work together (we were in entirely different buildings for the same company) and then I just decided to take a different pathway for work and left the company. We are still together, stronger than ever. Crazily, we have achieved moving states together and we are engaged. Life is wild, hey?
The thing is, if that person is your soul mate – it doesn’t matter if you decide against going for giving them a chance or not. It’s literally impossible to stop yourself from giving it a chance, because your entire core is saying yes when your mind is trying to be cautious. In all seriousness, I couldn’t have controlled the connection between myself and my partner. It was so strong, I would have married him within seconds of talking to him for the first time. Honestly! When you know, you just know.
Life is a crazy roller coaster. You are going to be thrown the wrong people to get to the right one. If that right one happens to be at your workplace, and that just happens to be the way you meet them – so be it. At least you got the opportunity to meet them.
A lot of people spend their entire lives looking for the right person, sometimes they don’t reach them until they’re in a retirement village and they have their entire life stories to go through and catch them up on. If you meet them at the workplace, you meet them at the workplace. It’s your journey together from there on that you get to choose where you want to go.
If it doesn’t work out, you can never blame yourself for trying. In all seriousness too, a job will never compare to the eternity of love from your soul mate. I would give anything and everything for this feeling. I wish I met him sooner if anything. I don’t regret a thing, I would do it all over again.
Speak soon guys!